Exploring Different Types of Parenting Styles

When you bring a newborn home for the first time, it can be pretty scary. You feel like now that you're a parent, you're supposed to have all the answers and know exactly how to raise your child. Often what you know about parenting good or bad comes from the way your mother and father raised you.

Child psychologists have done extensive research in the area of parenting styles. They've found the methods can be broken down into three main categories: authoritarian, permissive, and authoritative (also known as balanced or democratic). No one style is correct, and many parents will use techniques from all three parenting styles.

Authoritarian

Parents who are authoritarian believe in structure. While not being abusive, they set high standards of behavior for their children and require obedience. Adherents to this parenting style get little input from their children when making decisions. This style may be good for children with behavioral or conduct disorders because they need structure and authority. However, if this is not the case, the child of authoritarian parents will often have low self-esteem and rely more often on the voice of authority.

Permissive

While not being neglectful or careless, permissive parents let their children make many decisions. They use this parenting style to encourage creativity and spontaneity in their children. These parents use reasoning rather than authority when setting limits. This is a good parenting style for withdrawn children, but not for rebellious or aggressive children. This method can sometimes result in immature behavior and an inability to control impulses.

Authoritative

The authoritative style of parenting is often seen as the best. These parents are not particularly firm or permissive. They also will set high standards for their children but leave some of the decision-making up to each child. These parents reason with and listen to their children but don't hesitate to insist on certain behaviors and limits. This parenting style works well with middle-of-the-road children who are neither shy nor aggressive. It helps children develop a sense of independence and self-sufficiency.

It is important to know that parents don't often use one parenting style exclusively. But they do tend to lean toward one philosophy more. The style that is used to bring up a child must take the child's personality into account. What may work for one child might not be successful for another child with a different personality.

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